Life tosses out nasty curves without warning signs, potholes deep enough hit the earth’s inner core, and unexpected detours that take you the long, long way around. Most of us aren’t thrilled to find ourselves on the overcrowded unemployment expressway but here we are. We can think of it as a hellish road trip or enjoy the adventure as much as possible and see what we can learn. Here are a few of my favorite take aways from my job search.

There are worse things in life than being unemployed.

When you lose your job family, friends, and colleagues do care about you but they are busy. They have stuff going on in their own lives. You’re not front and center on their radar and simply don’t take the time to check on you.

Cooking at home is healthy, delicious, and cheap; and leftovers are free!

Speaking of free…I love things that are free! Free samples, free coupons, free events, free downloads, even buy one get one free. I despise those infomercial free systems that teach you how to make oodles of money at home with just your computer and some time. The CD is free but it’s impossible to stop them from charging your credit card $79.99 every month shipping and handling charges.

There are some incredibly kind, generous and ethical people in the world like an orthodontist who accepted the insurance payment for my root canal and didn’t bill me for the co-pay; a yoga teacher who graciously allowed me to attend her classes for half price; a friend of a friend who fixed my car and let me pay my bill in monthly installments; and neighbors who left big bags of fresh veggies at my door all summer long.

Asking for help comes out of strength not weakness, and when asked, most people are delighted to grant you a random act of kindness and lend a helping hand.

Put out a call to your village. Back in the day the whole community came together to build a neighbor’s barn. In the same way it takes a network to find a job and you want to cast your search net wide by thinking beyond what you’ve always done for work. Go deep in your past and contact previous bosses, colleagues, clients, professors, college friends, people whose work you admired, and mentors. Be bold! Contact people you don’t know and ask if they can spare time to talk with you about their industry.  

The easiest way to start making a difference in the world is by smiling! Yep, just flash those pearly whites and say hello! At one of my really low points I made it my mission to speak to strangers in the grocery store. Lots of them looked even more sad and worried than I was…like the ones buying groceries for 3 or 4 kids and older folks. So, I smiled at them, and whether it made a difference to them or not, I’ll never know but I felt so much better. Now it’s the most natural thing in the world for me to do wherever I go!

Life is too short and anger is too annoying to carry it around for very long. Anger woke me up at night and badgered me all day long until I chose to let go of it. Being angry hurts you way more than the person or situation you’re pissed at. Learn to forgive, let it go, and move on!

You can be unemployed and still enjoy life! Actually, this is a great time to do things you’ve never had time to do! You might not be able to do all the things you want…like my dream of spending 2 weeks in Tuscany just isn’t going to happen right now, but I watch everything about Italy that comes on the Travel Channel or Food Network. And I’ve watched Under The Tuscan Sun so many times I know the good lines by heart!

You’re the same person with or without a job. What counts is who you are at the core of your being. Oprah says if you’re a poor jerk and one day you make millions of dollars, you simply become a rich jerk. So, it’s not about what you have but how you chose to live your life. You were more than the job title and money you used to make and you’re certainly way more than an unemployed person or statistic. Celebrate who you are!